Masthead

Everything here is a real quote, attributed to whoever is on record as having said it. We did not invent any of them. That is the entire joke — these are things people said out loud, in public, usually into a microphone, often on a day they would rather forget.

We are not making a point. We are not doing commentary in the important sense. We print the words on cotton and post them to you.

Nothing is printed until somebody orders it. Our print partner routes the job to whichever facility is nearest you, which cuts both the delivery distance and the pile of unsold shirts to zero.

Unisex classic tee, ring-spun cotton, side seamed. Direct-to-garment print on the front. Wash it cold and inside out and it will outlast the news cycle that produced it.